As a society, one of our jobs is raising happy, healthy children; so that when the world enters it’s Mad Max phase in about 20 years they can look after us. So why does the worlds largest parenting website hate children so much? More specifically, why does it hate trans children so much?
CW – transphobia, child abuse, suicide
Rapid Onset What?
Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria or ROGD is a widely debunked and discredited faux diagnosis. The premise is that one day, seemingly out of the blue your child will tell you they are trans. But you had no idea! It must be a social contagion! They’ve caught it from Tumblr!
Now think back to your own childhood? Were there things you hid from your parents? Things that you didn’t feel you could talk to them about? If you have answered yes to that then you’ll begin to understand why ROGD is a bullshit claim. For many of us in LGBT community hiding who we are while we explored and tried to understand is completely normal. None of us tells our parents everything, it’s part of being a teenager.
Now Feminist Chat loves discredited studies; they still talk about Blanchard as if his word is law. So they have really taken to the idea of ROGD.
Now, let’s break down the above post. In the UK gender affirmation surgery is only offered to over 18s. For under 18s that express an unhappiness with their gender, social transition and affirmation is the common, medically approved pathway. The “raw data” shows that kids who have been affirmed and support grow up to be happier and healthier. The Littman study was pulled because the methodology was flawed and she only spoke to parents involved in anti-trans blogs such as 4thwavenow and Transgender Trend. It’s a whole load of confirmation bias.
As humans, we gravitate towards people with similar life experiences, similar tastes in sport/music/clothes ect. So why is any different for trans children? They’ve found other children going through a similar experience where they can explore amongst peers. Does this make it a rapid onset? No, it’s just children exploring their identity.
A quick reminder that anecdotal evidence is not peer-reviewed science. It’s also important to point out that gender expression and gender identity are not the same thing. If a girl expresses herself with short hair, boys clothes and love of toy trucks that doesn’t mean they are trans, it means they express themselves differently. If that same child say’s “I’m a boy” or “I should have been a boy” then maybe there is an identity there that can be explored. Expression and identity are not one and the same.
One of the websites/resources frequently linked by Feminist Chat is Transgender Trend. A website run by Stephanie Davis-Arai, a sculptor with no medical or social work background but who for some reason decided she wanted to crowdfund a schools pack to send unsolicited to UK schools. This pack is full of debunked, misinformation aimed at teachers who might support trans children. It goes against everything the NHS, Mermaids and medical professionals recommend for trans kids. Here’s a lovely video where she speculates about the sexual function of children. Stonewall have described Transgender trend as “dangerous”. Earlier this year she released a pack of stickers, aimed at children which were swiftly pulled and an apology given after a Buzzfeed article.
HELP! The trans got my child!
So, how does a Feminist Chat user deal with having a potentially trans child? Well, what amounts to conversion, corrective therapy.
This post can be summed up with “how do I fix my child?”. Pretty much every comment on this thread is “remove all outside influence”. Stop any resources your child might find useful to explore who they are and force them to your worldview.
One of the replies to the above thread is about delaying their education, stop them progressing. In other words; control them.
Now I’m not in anyway saying that children should be allowed to run free and do whatever they want. But controlling them to the point where removing all outside influence and delaying their education is damaging.
This trend continues on Feminist Chat. Threads upon threads of “Help, my child might be trans” with responses of control, correction, bordering on conversion. The repeated confusion of expression and identity.
It is worth noting that LittleGreySheep did get a lot of pushback and horrified comments about her post. So maybe, all is not lost.
Butterflies
LGBT media representation is poor at best. So when ITV commission a programme about a trans child it was a huge deal. For trans people, it was a reflection of their own childhood. For Feminist Chat it was just another way to dunk on trans people. The show was written with advice from Mermaids but is still a drama, a fiction.
Feminist chat called it “propaganda” “insidious”
They hated the idea of a positive trans story so much they complained to ITV; receiving the below response:
Over the 15 pages of this thread, they tear it apart. More talk about “propaganda”, “ethics violations”, “transing children” and “conspiracy”
If you’d like to see a proper response to them I would recommend this YouTube video from Fox and Owl. They break down the comments from a trans perspective. I’d also recommend their book for trans teenagers.
Empathy?
Feminist Chat is an empathy devoid black hole. They place their own hatred above the needs of their children, promoting damaging correction therapy. Breaking down gender barriers is important; not all girls like pink and not all boys like blue but the difference between expression and identity is widely ignored.
Now there are numerous threads on Feminist Chat arguing that the suicide statistics for trans children are lies, misrepresented or used as blackmail. Newsflash: ONE SUICIDE IS TOO MANY. It doesn’t matter if the numbers are slightly different, one child committing suicide is too many. One adult committing suicide is too many.
More Information
If you’d like more information regarding parenting trans children then follow some amazing parents on Twitter @FierceMum @DadTrans @mimmymum @transmum1
There is a current petition to stop Anti-LGBT material from schools, hopefully, England, Wales and Northern Ireland will follow Scotland and make LGBT education mandatory.
You can find more information about Mermaids and their work here.
Mumsnet Watch 